being bi - polar 1

sometimes i think the world is out to get me.. thats when my ears ring and i feel dizzy and my chest hurts and feels like my world is closeing in on me.. hard to come up for air when that is happening to me... but lately i have tried doing short breaths and that seems to help or walking alot like something will just set me off and when i am tired thats the worst it will happen to me and i get so depressed for a while then the next hour or so i am happy right away again.. living in my head is not to fun when that happens .. it actually hurts ..hurts the people i am near the ones that are closest to me.. or the ones who dont know whats going on and don't wanna know.. for me i have been different all of my life this way.. and this year i have to accept myself.. cause i am the only self i have... my friends help alot, and working helps me.. being out of the house seeing people music helps me alot to... like right now i am listening to 300 soundtrack and that helps alot and my cat who other wish i would be alone.. living in my head of pain..